The Road To Kingdom Come

There was a husband and wife in our parish that were converts to Catholicism. By anyone’s definition they were a bit odd. I pulled up behind their cars one day and saw that their license plates read, respectively, “BAHOLY1″ and “2BHOLY.” It struck me then that the call 2 B HOLY was a haughty aspiration and took a certain amount of guts (or personal presumption) to parade around on your license plates.

There seems to be a bit of spiritual snootiness associated with the word “holy.” I immediately think of the somewhat derogatory terms like “holy rollers” or “holier than thou.” But lately I have been thinking that to aspire to holiness is more of a necessity than a lofty goal.

I’m in a bad stretch here. Stomach problems, anxiety, depression (both a bit more under control), unethical and arrogant business partner, business downturn, financial worries, car repairs on top of car repairs, computer crashes (that indicate the need for a new computer), son loses girlfriend, brother loses job. It just doesn’t stop anymore. Of course, like any sane Christian, I am praying for healing and resolution to some (or all) of these issues. But during the past few days I have felt called to try and change the approach that I am having towards my prayer and my problems.

During the 33-day preparation for my Consecration to Mary, I read a lot about “virtue” in the writings of St. Louis de Montfort. I can’t remember exactly but I recall that he encouraged the reader to emulate the virtues of Mary. Her faith, her hope in God, Her humility, her patience, her acceptance, her surrender, her love. And he stated that one of the benefits of the consecration was that certain “effects would take place in your soul,” that one truly devoted to Mary would experience interior change. In essence, they would become “holier.”

I find my prayer petitions altered somewhat. I am now asking to share in the virtues of Mary, to aspire to want less and to be less. I pray that I can accept the will of God in all things as Mary did. I pray that I can love more, believe more fervently, hope more strongly. I pray that I can surrender all things to Christ through Mary. Instead of wanting everything to work out (which I still hope that it does) I pray that I can accept everything that happens in peace.

Of course, all of this is easier said than done. I can’t change just like that. It took me five decades to become this frightened, insecure wretch and it will likely take a very long time (if ever) to become a person that worries less, is less anxious and does not live in perpetual fear and panic. But, then again, anything is possible with God and so I will pester Mary to grease the skids towards virtue, to expedite the process that will help me 2 B HOLY.